I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Randomize
