morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
My balls are so social today.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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