Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize