girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
i think my cat just said my name.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
