Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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