He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
