Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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