I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
