I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize
