You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
so that wasnt chicken after all
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
