As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
