Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
