I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
