Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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