did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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