I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
