every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
