batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize