He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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