He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize