Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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