East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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