My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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