You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
