have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Randomize
