Grow some girl-balls and come out already
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
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