oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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