I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize