went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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