he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
