she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
