Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
These 17 People Made Horrible Decisions That Ruined Their Lives
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...