dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
