Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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