There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
