Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
