she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize
