my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
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