I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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