I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Congratulations! We have a period
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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