We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
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