i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
You ruined the universe
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
