I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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