You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Randomize
