he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
