Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
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