North Korea, Best Korea!
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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