she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
