New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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