everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
