Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
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